10 Warning Signs to Avoid When Hiring a Divorce Attorney (Notice the Red Flags and Don’t Get Burned!)

By: Elizabeth Vaz, Esq.

Date: March 19, 2025

Choosing the right divorce attorney is absolutely crucial when it comes to navigating the complexities of any divorce proceedings. A good attorney can guide you through the legal maze, advocate for your interests, and help you reach a fair resolution that will work for your unique situation. However, all attorneys are not created equally and not every attorney is the right fit for you and your situation. Here are ten red flags to watch for when choosing a divorce attorney to ensure you make the best choice for your situation.

1. Lack of Experience in Family Law

One of the most significant red flags is an attorney's lack of experience in family law. An attorney can practice in nearly all areas of the law once they graduate law school and are admitted to the state bar association. However, being able to practice in any area does not mean that they do, nor does it mean that they should. What I mean by that is; there are very nuanced issues within each area of the law, from bankruptcy law to real estate law to civil rights law, and there is no way for any attorney to know the intricacies of each one. Divorce and family law cases often involve complex legal issues that require specialized knowledge and experience. If an attorney primarily practices in other areas of law, or they practice in dozens of areas of the law, they may not be equipped to handle your divorce effectively. Always ask about their experience in divorce and family law and ask about what the percentage of their caseload is in the divorce and family law area.

2. Unrealistic Promises and Guarantees

Beware of attorneys who make unrealistic promises about the outcomes of your case. No attorney can - nor should- guarantee any specific results, and if they do, they are likely setting you up for disappointment. Even if the attorney tells you that they have been before this judge 100 times and the judge always rules a certain way, as an incentive to bolster your confidence in the outcome, this can be very misleading. Many judges make decisions like any other human being- based on the information they have in front of them in that moment. Making any type of promise or even a guess as to how your case will play out, is a fool's errand. A reputable attorney will provide a realistic assessment of your case, outlining both the potential challenges and favorable outcomes based on their experience and they will leave you to make the determination as to how you want to move forward.

3. Poor Communication Skills

Effective communication is vital in any attorney-client relationship. If an attorney is unresponsive, fails to return your calls or emails promptly, or doesn’t take the time to explain complex legal concepts, it may be a sign of poor communication skills. I have even seen situations where attorneys have spoken very sharply to their clients and have been flat out disrespectful. This is a huge red flag in my opinion. You need an attorney who values clear and open communication, keeping you informed throughout the process and listening to your input.

4. High Fees Without Transparency

While legal representation can be costly, and I believe strongly that attorneys should get paid for their experience and skill set, high fees without transparency can be another red flag. Ask about their fee structure, including hourly rates, retainer fees, and any additional costs you might incur, BEFORE hiring your attorney. The fee structure with your attorney should be crystal clear from the beginning and you should feel comfortable speaking with your attorney about this very important part of their representation in your case. If an attorney is evasive about their billing practices or charges excessively high rates without justification or full transparency and explanation- especially if you ask for same- it may be best to look elsewhere.

5. Inability to Provide Testimonials or References

While there is no requirement for an attorney to break any attorney-client privilege in giving you information, most reputable attorneys are able to provide references or testimonials from past clients. This is especially true in today's online world where testimonials are made public for all to read. If an attorney has no online presence (this may be a red flag on its own) with testimonials and they hesitate to provide this information to you, it could indicate a lack of credibility or a less-than-satisfactory track record. Speaking with or even reading reviews from previous clients can give you valuable insights into the attorney's effectiveness and style.

6. Unprofessional Behavior

Pay attention to how the attorney conducts themselves during your consultation. Unprofessional behavior, such as being disrespectful, unprepared, or dismissive of your concerns, is a significant red flag. Abd honestly, take notice of how they treat any support staff in the office or even how they speak about colleagues, judges, etc. If any attorney has no issues speaking in a less than professional manner about others, in your presence, this may not be a good sign as to how this attorney will speak about you in the future. You want an attorney who treats you - and others- with respect and professionalism, recognizing the seriousness of your situation.

7. Lack of a Clear Strategy

During your consultation, an effective attorney should be able to outline a clear strategy for your case. Of course, there is no legal advice until there is an official attorney-client relations and they must know all of the pertinent information first. However, if after hearing your information and your goals, if they cannot articulate how they plan to approach your divorce or if their strategy seems vague and unfocused, it could indicate a lack of experience or understanding of your unique situation. A solid plan, that is made with your input, demonstrates that the attorney has thought through your case, respects your input and is prepared to advocate for you and your best future.

8. Pushy or Aggressive Tactics

While it's essential to have an attorney who will advocate for your interests, overly aggressive or pushy tactics can be a red flag. An attorney who pushes you toward litigation or suggests taking an adversarial approach without considering your preferences, especially out-of-court options, may not be the right fit. Look for an attorney who respects your wishes and focuses on finding a resolution that works for you, without destroying your soon-to-be ex-spouse.

9. Failure to Discuss Alternative Dispute Resolution Options

Many divorce cases can be resolved through alternative dispute resolution methods, such as mediation or Collaborative Divorce. If an attorney fails to even discuss these options or dismisses them outright when you mention them, I see this as a huge red flag. If your situation is not right for mediation and this attorney can clearly demonstrate why, that is one thing. However, if they are dismissing the idea without even considering the reasons why it might work, this may be a sign that they are more focused on litigation and the fees associated with this strategy, rather than finding a cooperative resolution. An effective attorney should be open to exploring all avenues for resolving your divorce and helping you on your path forward.

10. Gut Feeling

Lastly, trust your instincts. I repeat, TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS! If something feels off during your consultation—whether it’s the attorney’s demeanor, communication style, or general attitude—don’t ignore that feeling. Your gut instinct can be a powerful indicator of whether an attorney is the right fit for you. Remember, you will be working very closely with this attorney and you need to feel comfortable and confident in their ability to represent you.

Choosing the right divorce attorney can significantly impact the outcome of your divorce and your entire future. By being vigilant and recognizing these red flags, you can make a more informed decision when selecting the right legal representation. Take your time, do your research, and trust your instincts to find an attorney who will advocate for your

interests and help you navigate this challenging time.

Your family and your future deserve the best legal support possible, so don’t hesitate to seek out an attorney who meets your needs and aligns with your goals.